The first time I did it, I was old enough to tell between good and evil. When you’re twenty one, they don’t send you to cute playschools with cuter women to look after you, or do they? I’ve done it in front of my friends, my economics professor, my neighbour’s dog, my grandmother’s pet gold fish, people I knew, people I never met before and a whole bunch of people you wouldn’t want to know about. Today, I can’t do it anymore. And it’s not me. It’s the rotten system that forbids it.
By now if you haven’t figured out what my ranting is all about… You must be -
o A dead sewer rat who got washed ashore last week
o A wretched introvert living in Pluto, who occasionally mutters a word or two to the potted plant on the window sill
o A fitness freak whose sex life is restricted to Sundays because the gym is closed on that day
o A numbskull diet freak whose mental activity is limited to the arithmetic of counting calories
o A lousy fucking pencil pusher who hides behind the reels of red tape and bureaucracy because it makes you feel important; or simply
o A health minister who still hasn’t figured out what to do with your rising power graph and falling popularity graph
But it’s ok. You don’t need a doctor turned politician turned self-styled messiah of the vote bank to tell you that smoking causes cancer, impotency, emphysema and other life threatening diseases that scientists are still discovering. For that matter, even marijuana, hashish and other recreational drugs can do the job more swiftly. Let’s allow the sale of recreational drugs and then ban their use in public places. Brilliant!
But not so fast Mr. Prophet! And not before you have told us how to stop the few million men who spend the last nickel of their day’s earnings on liquor; to go home to beat up their wives black and blue, and then have forced sex with them. Is the smoking ban going to change this? Or stop the rising suicides among our farmers for that matter??
So why kill joy by coming in the way of our troubled souls and our only solace (cheap publicity hehe). This is a free country and everyone of us is free to do what we like. Only that, the legitimacy of our actions depends on the ambiguity of our laws and our ability to arm-twist it. And your muscle’s bigger than mine. Anyways, your plight is sad. And sadder than mine. You can’t even smoke the peace pipe with me, even if you badly want to.